Godwin's Gays and Mel Brooks

The first several times I saw Mel Brooks' "To Be or Not to Be", I assumed the homosexual being rounded up by the German occupiers and being compelled to wear a pink triangle was just a gay joke. After all, if Jews wore yellow Stars of David, surely gays would wear a pink emblem, ha ha. I was taught history in school—grade, middle, high and college. We covered WWII several times, and nobody ever taught me that any group besides the Jewish were systematically rounded up and taken to concentration camps.

The last time I watched was the first time it occurred to me to do an internet search to see if there might be any truth to the concept. Holy shit, this was real. Gays were compelled to sew pink triangles into their clothing, and about 10,000 - 15,000 gays were sent to concentration camps. Far fewer, of course, than the 6 million Jews murdered in such camps, but how shocked was I that this part of history was simply omitted from my many years of heterogeneous—and apparently exclusively heterosexual—schooling.

Recall the George Carlin bit about bad words and the differences between "fart" and "fuck"? On TV they could say neither word, but there was much talk and action revolving around fucking, while nobody spoke of farts. Television was a fart-free zone. (Clearly this has changed in the past 20 years; I have to suspect Carlin's observations helped this along.) In school I learned all sorts of nasty history about wars, genocide, oppressive rulers, mass murder and rape, and Republicans. But I had no knowledge of the concept of homosexuality until I was 14, and then I was so naive I thought it was a new thing. Okay, so gay people didn't all come from the United Gay Republic on the continent of Gaydia, with their own skin color and religion, but still, this is a group that has been repeatedly identified, singled out and harassed or oppressed by rulers and governments over the years, but there was nothing about it in my schooling. It makes me wonder what else was left out.

It has actually been a while since I've seen To Be or Not to Be, but I was reminded of the internment of gays by a news radio report. A gay man who was sent to a concentration camp and survived has recently decided to tell his story. I guess part of my brain still thinks homosexuality was invented in 1984, because I was surprised to hear him speak of openly gay clubs and an active gay community in his pre-WWII hometown.

It reminded me of our more paranoid reasons for starting this blog anonymously. Sometimes I get to thinking that it's "okay" to be atheist. But the gays' recent and continuing persecution is a good example of what could happen to us, even in America, even in these modern times. Look how many people are trying, and how hard they're trying, to make/keep gay marriage illegal. Seriously what the fuck do you care? From all the fuss you'd think gays and lesbians are trying to pass laws compelling straight Christian families to bring homosexuals into their living rooms to have exhibitionist gay sex in front of their children. No, they just want the same life partner arrangement that heterosexuals have access to.

What do gay marriage opponents fear? Is it dick-in-asshole? But preventing state-recognized marriage doesn't prevent dick-in-asshole, and allowing state-recognized marriage doesn't bring dicks in assholes any closer to you. I can relate to not liking dicks in assholes, because as open-minded and accepting as I am, I just don't want to see dicks in assholes, I don't want my dick in an asshole, I don't want my dick in a man's mouth or hand, and I want nothing to do with another man's dick. I still have lingering homophobia about those things. But I don't give a flying fuck if other mentally well-balanced, responsible adults mutually consensually do with their dicks, assholes, pussies, mouths and hands at the appropriate venues.

I tend to project my phobias onto other people, and I should really stop doing that, especially with people who behave so differently from me. The more I think about it, the more I think it is about control and conformity. They don't subscribe to "live and let live". They want you to conform to their actions, their beliefs, their thoughts, and they'll be damned if you can be nonconformist and not be punished or at least shunned. So yeah, I think people would try to disallow atheist marriage if they could. And I think many Americans would persecute atheists if given the chance.

Hell, maybe they already are, but that part of history was left out of my text books.

I still can't get over that. A group of people systematically identified and interned by German occupation forces in WWII, and after 17 years of schooling and many years of cable TV history shows I had to learn of it from Mel Brooks, who by the way is a brilliant man. I am in awe of how he attacks the Nazis, racism and other general dickishness with such satirical ferocity and makes it entertaining.

Marriage = MY FUCKING BUSINESS, the return!

Hey guys, we got a great comment on the original Marriage = blog! Go check out the latest comments, and throw your $0.02 in the ring.

Marriage = MY FUCKING BUSINESS

I have a new job, and I have a new favorite place to park at my building. Two days out of the last three, this big, bumper sticker-plastered truck has been in the space next to mine. Every time I see it, I have to fight the very sudden, violent, and real urge to key the fucking thing, because of this one particular sticker.

[Sorry, I'd've posted the pic directly, but I'm apparently dumber than Blogger.com.)

It's clearly one of those fucking holier than thou "sanctity of marriage" movements. I did a search so I could include the image, and found out exactly which movement: CBN's.

PROTECT THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE
Let your voice be heard.
Request your free bumper sticker!

We the people proclaim that marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman! Please support the Federal Marriage Amendment (H.J. Res. 56):

Marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman. Neither this Constitution or the constitution of any State, nor state or federal law, shall be construed to require that marital status or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon unmarried couples or groups.

CBN is proclaiming God's truth and love to America! Please join with us.

■Pray that God will protect His divine plan for marriage and the family.


■Act by contacting your senators, representatives and state legislators. Call the Capitol switchboard at (202) 224-3121 or log on to http://congress.org to contact your state and federal legislators by e-mail.


■Share with your family and friends. It is vital to let our voices be heard now -- before the Supreme Court has a chance to make same-sex unions the irrevocable law of the land.

First, why this makes me violently mad: I can't fucking stand when people cheerfully, and with a great sense of community and purpose, fuck other people over. The smug fucking assholes haven't walked a single step in gay man or woman's shoes, but they'll happily say they're not real people and shouldn't have real rights. Hey, maybe they're 3/5ths of a person, right?

Next, let's pick this apart a bit. "We the people " oh don't go all Declaration of Independence on us so you can pretend to be opressed, noble, and intelligent. "We fucking holier-than-thou Christians" would be way more accurate. Okay, moving on.

"We [fucking holier-than-thou Christians] proclaim that marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman!" I'm going to skip right over "sacred" so I can move on to this: "Marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman. Neither this Constitution or the constitution of any State, nor state or federal law, shall be construed to require that marital status or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon unmarried couples or groups." To turn that into Normalspeak, "No law should be understood to mean that 'marriage' has to include fags."

Okay, so marriage is sacred penis-and-vagina territory, and laws should enforce that. So this should be a nation of Christian laws. Oh yeah, THAT'D be just swell.

How many times, and how many different ways, do we have to ask, please, beg, scream, WHY DOES IT FUCKING MATTER TO YOU FUCKS??!? What do you CARE if I peg my husband in the ass, or if my best guy friend likes cock? He's not after YOUR cock! YOU'RE too homophobic, uptight, stupid and unattractive?

Personal attacks? Oh yeah, I'm all about the personal attacks. You started it, asswipes. Your cute little Man + Woman sticker could easily - and more honestly - look like this:




Edit: I'm SO happy. I was already happy about this post (man, that was cathartic), then I went looking on cafepress.com for marriage related bumper stickers. My absolute favorite is the FOCUS ON YOUR OWN DAMN FAMILY one. I gots ta buy it, I just GOTS to.

Fluffy Gay Blog that is full of WIN

This, this is full of WIN WIN WIN



I only wish that I'd done this first. And that I was gay and had married a girl as hot and funny as this. I'm just sayin.

Dan Savage on God

I'm a big Dan Savage fan, and I loved what he had to say on a few famliar topics (here's the full article):

Homos are marrying in California as of this week (congrats to all), and should a tornado—or an earthquake or a meteor or the Incredible Hulk—flatten, say, San Francisco's City Hall during a big gay wedding, respected leaders of the religious right will rush to cable broadcast studios to insist that the tornado/earthquake/meteor/Hulk was God's divine judgment, His righteous wrath, the Baby Jesus's latest temper tantrum, wocka wocka wocka.

"I believe that the judgment of God is a very real thing," said the Rev. John Hagee, John McCain's ex-BFF, when asked about Hurricane Katrina, which struck New Orleans just before a "massive homosexual rally," a/k/a an annual street party called Southern Decadence, was supposed to take place in the French Quarter. "I believe that the Bible teaches that when you violate the law of God, that God brings punishment sometimes before the Day of Judgment. And I believe that Hurricane Katrina was, in fact, the judgment of God against the city of New Orleans."

And God got His way: By drowning all those little old ladies in their attics in the Ninth Ward, God prevented that massive gay rally—for one year.

So how does a douchebag like Hagee explain away the tragedy in Iowa last week? A tornado struck a Boy Scout camp, killing four and injuring scores more, and the Scouts are famously anti-gay and anti-atheist. Well, we need only consult the same interview with Rev. Hagee to learn the answer: While all natural phenomena represent God's "permissible will," says Hagee, "it is wrong to say that every natural disaster is the result of sin . . . . No man on Earth knows the mind of God."

See how that works? Not every natural disaster is the result of sin, you see, because sometimes natural disasters happen to us, not just to them—and when they happen to us, well, the Lord sure moves in mysterious ways, and no man on Earth knows the mind of God. But let a natural disaster strike San Francisco this week, next week, or ever again, and Rev. Hagee will be able to read the mind of God like it was a large-print edition of Highlights for Children.

Gay Marriage, Christian Bigotry

I went looking for Christian blogs and comments. Know thy enemy, right? I'm actually so sad I don't know where to begin.

Why does being a Christian mean swallowing the whole thing, hook line and sinker? And by the whole thing, I mean everything the xtian higher ups pick and choose out of the bible. God made Adam and Even, be fruitful and multiply, etc etc. But we don't bother about stoning witches and all that. Though, creepily enough, one commentator brought that up:

God's word is clear and this type of marriage should not be allowed. However, the old testament practice of putting them to death right now is not an option. How can anyone come to know Jesus once they are dead?

Ok, so you're willing to forgo one part of the Bible in hopes that fags will accept Jesus. How screwed up is that?

"you can see why the Homosexuals would love this to become legal, because then they can slowly but surely enact equal rights and benefits for their mates." As always, you make the simplest things sound so SINISTER. Oh my GOD, if they can get MARRIED then they'll slink their stealthy way into us TREATING THEM like they're married. OMFG!! *ahem* I think it's part of the point, dude.

About the point that God made man and woman to make babies, and fags can't make babies...why then aren't Christians horribly up in arms about straight men and women who choose not to procreate? By this logic, Surfer Jesus' and my siblings are just as horrible and god-hating as all those California fags, because none of them have been knocked up. (Ironic to think that SJ and I are more "godly" in that sense than others, eh?) If it must be legislated that marriage is for a man and a woman, then it should also be legislated that men and women who get married MUST procreate. Be fruitful and multiply; God directly commands it. Better legislate it, too. If you don't, this also "constitutes yet another blatant slap in His face".

And we've talked about this a LOT recently, but it gets me yet again:

Issues such as this one make me very thankful to know we do not have to endure this much longer. As the world spins toward its certain appointment with destruction; we look to the heavens from which our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ will soon appear. Just as God saved Lot and his family from the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, so God will save us from the certain destruction of this evil world through the soon appearing of His Son. Praise God.

Geez, how ungrateful can you get?

Lord, thank you for this beautiful world, my life, my wife and children, my You-appointed dominion over the creatures of the land sea and air. Please, Lord, bring it to an end at your earliest possible convenience. Amen. "This evil world", indeed.

And to end on a positive note: "psalmthirtyseven" actually seems to have a bit of sense. You know, for a Christian.

AOTD4 by the revered Dan Savage

Dan's column this week, titled I Want to Marry Someone Younger I've Never Dated. What Do I Do?, features this:

When two dudes get married, the marriage-is-between-one-man-and-one-woman brigades crap their collective pants, vomit up 10,000 press releases, and run in circles screaming about all the hurricanes and earthquakes and unattractive haircuts that Our Loving Father is gonna rain down on our heads if we don't pry Adam off Steve right fucking now.

Well, the one-man-and-one-woman crowd has been strangely silent about this polygamist sect all over the news. It appears that the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has been organizing marriages/statutory rapes between one man and dozens or more women and/or girls. "Where's the outrage?" writes a reader, which prompted me to go looking for some outrage at the reliably outraged website of Concerned Women for America (cwfa.org). There are more anti-gay-marriage press releases packed onto CWFA's website than there is fudge packed into all the homos in all the Sodoms in all of North America. But there's not one single word that I could find about these straight men in Texas violating the holy and sacred one-man-and-one-woman rule. What gives?

Simply love that man.